Category: Random Writings

RIP to the Entertainment District, I Miss You

I was walking through Liberty Village yesterday on my way to the Eaton Center and all I could think about was ‘holy shit this is a lot of condos!’ I feel like all of us downtown dwellers think about this regularly. It probably also extends to those who live outside of Toronto, those who once upon a time enjoyed the fruitful spoils of the Entertainment District in downtown Toronto.

When I was younger my friends and I would drive from Hamilton to Toronto on any given Friday or Saturday (even Sundays) to find a good party in the Entertainment District. You wouldn’t even need to have a specific club in mind because one stroll up Richmond St. would lead to encounters with dozens of promoters trying to get you into THEIR club.

This definitely is no longer the case. I can’t even tell you the last time someone spoke to me on Richmond St. A while ago I read this piece that was in Toronto Life discussing the ten signs of the death of the Entertainment District. Not only is that area dead, it’s basically in the Good Place with Kristin Bell trying to decided how the hell it got there. Yes, the answer is gentrification. Sure is.

I miss dancing. I miss dance clubs. I especially miss Fluid and Kool Haus. I understand that Kool Haus isn’t even in the Entertainment District, but I had to shout it out real quick. The amount of amazing fetes I went to there and in the entire Guvernment Complex are epic EPIC memories in my mind.




Maybe I am showing my age? Perhaps the younger people enjoy the stuck-up King West bars where people spend more time on Snapchat than dancing. Where a bottle costs 1/3 of your monthly rent (if you live outside Toronto, of course). This really didn’t use to be my reality. During my clubbing times I was in the musical epicenter of Gully v Gaza clashes and you wouldn’t step into ONE downtown nightclub without hearing some remnants of that. Remember when dancehall use to play downtown? HA. I mean gunman songs, not One Dance. This is not a drag of Drake, I like him and his music, but which song are we truly throwing a gun finger to for him? OK.

If you walk by now all you hear is fuckboy music lite playing everywhere. Again, not a slight against the actual artists, but everyone from Toronto knows exactly what I’m talking about. It’s that Weeknd-PND-Whoeverthehellispopularrightnow type mix. The Bay Street millennials who can afford the bottle but can’t keep beat. The guys commuting in from Woodbridge who absolutely cannot wait to jump on a couch at a club in their spikey kicks, because you damn well know their mom not allowing that shit at home. The girls who not there to dance, they’re just there to screwface but smile and turn up the second a camera is on them to prove to their IG fans how FUN and not bitchy they are.

I miss Circa. I miss Fluid. I miss Seven. Shit I’ll even go as far to say I miss Frequency and Wetbar, minus the violence at the former. At least people in those clubs danced, felt free, the music was amazing and if you had bottle service no one even gave a shit because you still were dancing.

Everywhere I use to party is basically a pinch condo now. How do you bring in MORE young people to downtown but make partying less available? To go to a decent party now would require a minimum of a $30 Uber ride one way. As people came in from the suburbs, the clubs went out there. What a damn shame.

SOOOO far gone are the amazing Sunday nights you would listen to Spexx and/or Dr. Jay while you’re driving into Toronto that would get you hype as shit for the night you were about to have. Those were some of the most fun times in my life.

I’m happy we still have boat rides downtown, but obviously that is very limited to only summertime in Toronto which literally lasts a second here.

It’s crazy I was a bouncer for five years in this city and just watched it burn to shit right in front of me. Less and less dancing, more and more posing, and yes, condos. There’s a genuine sadness about it because I feel like although I am lucky enough to have experienced it, the missing of it sucks pretty bad. It’s one of those, ‘is it better to have clubbed and lost, or to have never clubbed at all?’

I am sad. RIP to the Entertainment District.

  • Mirna

My Problem With ‘Suffering’ Tourism

Whether you call it dark tourism/grief tourism (tourism directed to places that are identified with death and suffering) or thanatourism (personification of death, refers more specifically to peaceful death) – I need to know what the hell draws you to it?

I’m going to call it suffering tourism because you are going out of your way to be a tourist in places where suffering took/takes place. Now, I do understand there is no place in this world where suffering hasn’t taken place. That I fully grasp. But going there to experience these things as an outsider who wants to FEEL immersed in it? Are you sick fam? 

Recently there was an article on Twitter posted about a war hostel in Sarajevo. The title of this article drew me in pretty quickly, ‘Recreating death for a living: Inside Bosnia’s War Hostel‘. 

What? Šta? Co? Qué? Quoi? क्या? Ano?

The only way to explain my ‘what the fuckness??‘ was in like seven different languages. 

So I went along and read the article and yes, it was exactly what I thought. This place offers an immersive experience ‘where visitors get a taste of daily life in a warzone.‘ I’m not even sure where I can begin to tell you how I feel about this. I’ve read the article like four times now and I’m still wondering what the hell is wrong with people. In the article the person who owns the hostel says they offer it so that people can learn what happens when ‘…people get divided into us and them.’ They can’t go read a book? They don’t have Google? You need to tell me, the only way for people to understand divisive politics that lead to genocide is to pay money and pretend they were us during the worst times in our lives? 

*refer back to the seven languages of WHAT?! above*

This has been on my mind a lot lately. I had done an itinerary for carnival in Brazil and went wandering into activities and tours one could do while in Rio. There was a nice option for a visit to the Christ the Redeemer statue and some hang gliding, awesome. Then I saw something called ‘Tour of the Favelas’. I’m there reading this description and it’s saying something along the lines of it is a RESPECTABLE tour of some favela in Rio. 

If you don’t know what a favela is, it is basically the hood area in Brazil. The disproportionately low-income and high-crime area. When my Brazilian friends tell me about going to Brazil, this is exactly the area they tell me to stay away from. Tours? So, you’re going to do what? Walk by and look at the poor people like they’re circus acts? What is it that could possibly make you want to pay money to go observe these people? Nah. I don’t see anything respectable about that.

My friend Kenya was Tweeting along with me the other day about this topic, she was saying how she has no interest in going to old prisons, asylums, Auschwitz or Elmina castle in Ghana. I felt that. Accurate representation of how I also feel about places with such horrific histories.

However, this is one important part I would like to add in right now. Those who are of certain diasporas wanting to go to these places in researching their OWN history? That is not the same as suffering tourism. Those of the Jewish faith visiting Auschwitz makes sense. Black people in USA, Canada, Caribbean etc. wanting to go visit Elmina castle in Ghana makes sense. 

As a Bosnian refugee I have zero interest in visiting a damn war hostel in Sarajevo. Granted, that isn’t necessarily my history as I was fully alive and present for the war in Bosnia. I’m good on all that, I don’t need to feel, see or experience that shit. That is actually my life. 

I had also seen that there is a tour in Sarajevo that takes you into the underground tunnels that were made by the army to get around the city while there was snipers outside. I…. Ok. No thanks, again.

When I told my mom about these things she said it all has to do with money. If people can somehow make money off any aspect of tourism, they will. Some people are ‘history buffs’ (I’m using this term VERY loosely) and want to be immersed. You an anthropologist?

Few weeks ago there was an article I came across from a journalist describing his trip to (I believe) it was Auschwitz as well. He was saying how it was crazy going to a place with such a sordid history but the tourists there just running around eating their snacks and taking selfies by the gas chambers. That does not sit well with me. I want no part.

Why wouldn’t you travel to places in search of times of jubilation? Happiness? If you are going to Carnival somewhere, why aren’t you educating yourself about that aspect of your trip? Why do you need to go to a favela tour if you’re in Rio or a plantation tour if you’re in Barbados? Is that absolutely necessary for you to experience?    

The best way I could explain it to some of you is by using what happened a week ago today in Toronto. The monster who decided to kill a group of innocent people at Yonge and Finch.

Imagine if two months, two years, two decades (whatever) from now – someone decided to make a ‘Van Massacre in Toronto Tour‘ Taking tourists from other countries to see and IMMERSE themselves in one of the worst days this city has ever experienced.

How would you feel if someone was offering ‘Residential School System Experience‘ as a tour? Given we know the horrific things that the native population in Canada went through in those buildings. Would make me sick.

So I ask some of you who clearly don’t accept books, school or Google as being ENOUGH for your learning of history, why? If it wouldn’t be acceptable in showcasing the tragedies in Canada for profit, why is it OK for you to go see it everywhere else?

– Mirna 

  

Safe Travels! My Top 5 Safe Destinations For Women to Travel Alone

Bet some of you REALLY sick of waiting on others to get their shit together so you can travel right? I know those ones still. So now you’re in this situation like, ‘can I go there alone? am I going to be safe? is my self-imposed curfew going to be when the street light turn on?’ 

Relax. I got you. I’ve been traveling alone for almost 12 years now and I’ve managed to make it out in one piece. 

The first thing I will mention before going into this list is, if you are sick of your friends trying to get their funds together, get time off work etc. etc. etc. I made a blog post with a manifesto on how to go about traveling alone that you can read here. Also, I made a whole post about your biggest tool when traveling alone (and it can definitely apply to groups as well) – trusting your gut while traveling. 

Now let’s get into this list! 

All five weren’t necessarily somewhere I did travel to alone, however, I would definitely return to them alone at any given time.

#5: Somewhere super close, CHICAGO!

Before you start with the nonsensical media-only-fueled notions of Chicago – zip it. The amount of times I have endured the ‘omg you’re going to Chiraq?’ questioning is ridiculous at this point. I love Chicago. I have traveled there with a friend, I have traveled there alone twice and I love the place so much I even brought my boyfriend there last year for his 30th birthday. Not a single person I know that has actually stepped a foot in Chicago had anything negative to say about it. (Minus my friend Martha, who didn’t like Harold’s chicken. Disgrace.)

I found the mid-westerners to be incredibly nice and cordial. There was a couple of occasions where I was staring down at my Google-maps directions and a stranger would come up to me on the street and ask me if I’m lost and then offer their own directions. In the bars and restaurants I found locals to be really welcoming and nice to talk to. When I was at some breakfast place near my AirBnB two years ago for the NFL Draft, one of the servers sparked a conversation about NFL with me. I ended up sitting there for an extra hour with three other patrons AND that servers just talking NFL. 

Do not let the media dictate your opinions of Chicago. Go there, eat some pizza, go to the million sports events they have, go walk down the Magnificent Mile, make some friends at the bars (or on Tinder?) and yes, go to the South Side to get some Harold’s Chicken with mild sauce. Heck, lay down on a glass floor and have other tourists take pictures of you on it like I did in the header for this piece. 

#4: Somewhere super friendly, ST. MAARTEN!

This is the only place on this list that I didn’t travel to alone. I mean, the second I find a cheap flight back there I would gladly go there alone ASAP. This island was warm, fun and you just felt really good being there.

Between the really nice staff at every establishment we went to eat or drink at, to the amazing drivers and just overall friendly locals – I can’t imagine a friendlier place. When I saw ‘The Friendly Island‘ as a licence place I was like OKAAAAAAAAAAAY this is the place for me. As soon as my friend Lorren and I landed in St. Maarten one of the first cab drivers we had was so friendly and hospitable that when he found out if was my birthday the next day, he offered us a free ride to and from the nightclub we were going to. NO charge. When we went out the following day, he was there to pick us up and also to drop us off. Just as a kind gesture to some tourists.

Also, we made a friend on the beach in Philipsburg who was so cool he actually gave us a tour of the entire island (French + Dutch), got us into a nightclub for free, oh, and did I mention? Randomly let me drive his car because ‘you said you didn’t know how, so figured it’s a good time to learn.’  

Would be back on that island as soon as I can. The generosity and hospitality there is nothing like I have ever seen before. Well, except for my #1 place if you keep reading :). 

#3: Somewhere super touristy, CROATIA!

I guess for this country I would be a little biased, having spent a lot of time during my childhood there and having family that still lives there. But how could you not love and feel completely safe in a place like Croatia? It’s incredible there.

For any woman trying to enjoy beaches (ALL BILLIONS OF THEM IN CROATIA it feels like), get good food and just mingle with nice locals and tourists alike – Croatia is your spot. I’ve been to Croatia alone and although I’m fluent in the native language there, English would have been perfectly fine as well. The place has become a tourist haven so everyone speaks English, along with, German, French, Italian…. it is totally normal to meet people in the service industry in Croatia who speak 5+ languages. 

Croatia is so safe that they have nude beaches. Yes, you could go full buck nekkid and no one will even blink an eye at it. As someone coming from the suffocating censorship and body issues of the North American continent ESPECIALLY, you will feel liberated in Croatia. All body types and ages prance around on some of the nude beaches. Living the good life, no tan lines.

#2: Somewhere hella far, SINGAPORE!

I went to Singapore alone and was out wandering the streets at 2am on Christmas, drunk and eating tacos. What else do you need to know? Can a place possibly feel ANY safer than that? 

Singapore is the cleanest city I have ever seen. From their airport, to the transit system and to their incredible downtown waterfront. Doesn’t matter what time of day it is, there is young people everywhere walking around and enjoying life. Not bothering anyone and in fact, asking you to join in THEIR shenanigans instead. There was just so much to do as a lone traveler in Singapore that it almost felt like they were catering to my Snapchat feed. Everything was impressive. Everything was beautiful. Everywhere felt safe.

I wouldn’t suggest chewing gum or spitting on their streets if you’d like to keep your sense of safety, but otherwise it is a great place to roam alone. Just remember when you go to bring lots of money as the cleanliness and luxury you feel in that city definitely will cost you more.

#1: Somewhere exceptionally hospitable, CUBA!

My favourite place.

I have been to Cuba on numerous occasions with family, a boyfriend and alone. This is by far the country I feel safest in when visiting. From the people I made friends with there, to the staff at various resorts and casa particulars, to even the customs agents at the airport. For an overall sense of being welcome and safe – Cuba tops all the countries I’ve been to.

When I would travel to Santiago de Cuba alone, I would be out at all hours of the night. On several occasions I would ask the motorcycle taxi drivers to give me a ride into the center way past midnight. I would sit in a bar alone and just people watch from 1am to 3-4am in the center. I loved those moments. 

I realize some women complain about Cuba not feeling safe for them because of the men giving them too much attention. For me personally, I don’t mind the attention. I’ve learned to block it out. It just never bothered me as much as it does other people and I am not here to tell them how to feel. I just know that not one man that ever whistled or yelled ‘que linda!’ at me ever took it past that point. Whether I was out in the market, at a baseball game, at a nightclub or on a beach. I always feel safe when I am in Cuba.  If you are a woman trying to embark on your first solo trip – this would be an awesome place to start. 

Tell me readers, what country did you feel safest in? Leave a comment.

– Mirna

Traveling While in A Relationship

“How does your man deal with you leaving so often?“

“My girl could never!“

“You know the shit girls do on their lil’ girl trips!“

Oh, men and their opinions on your traveling. Been there, had that. As someone who travels as much as I possibly can – some of these comments and questions come up regularly in my life/on my Twitter page. 

When I was single and going on dates with various men, my love of travel would always come up in the conversations. Travel is a big part of my life and if someone wants to get to know me, they’ll know I often will just book a flight to go somewhere and leave for a long weekend or a week or Christmas etc. My lifestyle would not work for an insecure man who can’t even leave his girlfriend to go pee alone in a bathroom, clearly. 

While it seems men get to use being well-traveled as a bonus in their dating repertoire, it kind of seemed to do the opposite for me. Not all men, but MANY men are not cool with their girlfriend doing things without them. Yikes. Stay far away from those.

I’ve been fortunate enough that the men I did choose to actually date are cool as heck with my travel goals. It really couldn’t have gone any other way. If it is between travel and a boyfriend I rather spread the pages in my passport than spread my le…. well, you get it. 

The thought of a man trying to tell me what I can and cannot do with my traveling gives me gas pain. I was traveling before these men and I will do so while with them and after them. It is one of my loves. (along with food and the NFL) I go on girls trips to Europe, I go to Carnival and attend soca fetes and I travel alone to the NFL Draft. That’s me.

It is totally possible to find a man who is A-OK with your travel habits. My ex was cool with it and my current boyfriend is as well. I take the greatest amount of satisfaction when my boyfriend actually travels with me, but I also take the same satisfaction in him not being weird about when I travel alone or with my girls. I’m really happy with that. 

Travel requires a lot of trust with it, and if someone doesn’t trust you in the confines of your relationships they sure as HELL won’t trust you flying somewhere without them. Also, to the men, if you ever worry about your girl doing dumb shit like cheating while she travels then perhaps that is NOT the girl for you? I assure you, she was waste way before she got on that flight. 

– Mirna 

Tips for UAE and Maldives

I’m one of those people who LIVES on message boards and reads everything I possibly can about places I am about to travel to before I get there. Preparedness, I find, keeps me out of unnecessary situations when traveling. For my recent trip to Abu Dhabi, Dubai and the Maldives I read up on the rules, laws and other touristy stuff. I also made a financial breakdown for those wondering how much all of this would cost. 

Even after ALL of that? There was some things that caught me completely off guard once I landed that I don’t think these message boards explained well or were just very vague about. I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole of Tripadvisor reviews and message boards but it can be pretty confusing and not definitive at times. I wanted to just tell everyone some of the things that I was either surprised by or not prepared for. 

Money:

The first surprise we were in for was the taxes at the hotels on food. My goodness. I swear to you, EVERYTHING had like a 22% tax on it. I wish I had taken better notes of it but it was something along the lines of a 10% tourist tax, another 10% property tax and I can’t really remember what the other 2% was. Now imagine? Our breakfast was already a walloping $35 per person or drinks were $10 per person, now add 22% tax to ALL of that. This is a necessary piece of information for all of you to know because adding almost 1/4th + tip to everything when you go eating and drinking can really add up.  

On the topic of eating, the food prices in Dubai and Abu Dhabi were really ridiculous. I’m sure that there are cheap eats somewhere in those cities, however, we would have needed to taxi or Uber to those locations which would defeat the whole purpose of trying to save money. There were moments we would go into restaurants and wonder how it was possible the appetizer and the main course were only a $3 difference? Makes no damn sense to me. Luckily, Maldives had very fresh food that was much much cheaper in comparison to our spots in the UAE.

Transportation:

Note that there is no Uber in Abu Dhabi but there is Uber in Dubai. I did read that somewhere in the message boards but I figured I would include that here because it may save you some time and headaches knowing beforehand. The nice thing about Abu Dhabi’s taxi services is that they are heavily regulated and they all had Wi-Fi inside. And when I say regulated – the taxi drivers dashboard would begin making a noise if the he went above a certain speed limit ‘YOU ARE GOING ABOVE THE SPEED LIMIT. YOU ARE GOING ABOVE THE SPEED LIMIT. PLEASE SLOW DOWN‘! Imagine that being a thing in Toronto or NY the way our cabbies drive? No chance.

In Dubai, all the Ubers we got were either a BMW or Lexus (that’s basic Uber, not even Uber Black) and yes, they do have UberCHOPPER there as well just in case you want to fly over the traffic. Wild. Do note that there are now designated Uber pickup locations in Dubai so you can’t just be picked up everywhere and anywhere like we can here in Toronto. In places like Mall of the Emirates and Dubai Mall there are two or three areas where they are allowed to pick you up or otherwise face a fine. 

On the topic of transportation, I would highly recommend using the bus between the two cities that only takes about 90 minutes and costs $9.00 (Canadian) one way. There is no need to pay all that money for a taxi to bring you from Abu Dhabi to Dubai or vice versa when these buses are safe, they have reclining seats and are well air conditioned. I was pleasantly surprised.

Airports:

Dubai airport is the busiest place I have ever seen. When they tell you to be there two hours early, please do listen to them. I suppose because we flew from there on Christmas Eve maybe it was a little extra busy but I wouldn’t risk it there. There are people yelling across the room everywhere and even some standing on the conveyor belts to push the massive cargo going through. Also, be prepared that in some parts of the airport there are still just squat toilets. Wish I had known that before wearing a romper.

On the other side of this spectrum was the main airport in the Maldives. We were told that during the holiday season the recommended time to arrive was three hours before departure. I am so happy we did NOT listen to that. This airport is very small and there is nothing to do there, so if we had sat there for three hours? Our journey home would have felt even longer than the 40hrs it already was going to take. We arrived at the airport about 45min before boarding and still had time to spare. Maybe everyone else listened to that three hours before nonsense and that is why there was no lineups, I’m not sure. I just know we arrived and were blessaz.     

Other:

I was completely unaware of how dense the fog in Abu Dhabi and Dubai was. Wowzers. I just assumed these were hot places with nice weather all the time and the occasional sandstorm. There was some mornings in Dubai we couldn’t see our own hotel if we looked up, that is how dense the fog is. When you book activities like going up to the Burj Khalifa or doing the Dining In The Sky, this fog situation is really important because it can make the experience not as awesome as it should be. 

Probably the most VAGUE thing I read about was clothing in the UAE. Everyone is full of shit. I’m just going to tell you that from the jump. I’m not saying you should be out there in pum pum shorts and a crop top, but seriously, it is NOWHERE as strict as some people try to make you believe. When we got to Dubai I threw on a backless maxi dress and not a single soul screwed up their face at me at all. Everywhere had tourists walking around in shorts and tank tops just fine. I could have brought ALL my thottie dresses to Dubai and Abu Dhabi and gone to the club without any disturbance. So please, bring your thottie dresses to go out at night – no one cares.

My one final piece of information that kept coming up with others when talking about this trip was that many people are unaware about the liquor laws in UAE and in Maldives. In my experience there, drinking in Abu Dhabi and Dubai went great. We were inebriated in Abu Dhabi twice in one day and in Dubai we were able to drink by the pool as well. Not saying you should get publicly intoxicated or expect wine and beer to be served in restaurants – but it is definitely accessible. Now the Maldives? Ah. We stayed on a local island not a private one. Note that on these local islands there is NO LIQUOR. It is completely dry. No liquor at the restaurant and no liquor at your hotel. I believe it is even illegal to bring liquor in your checked-in luggage to the Maldives. (I’d do some research on that one) The private islands are the ones that have access to alcohol so if you are trying to go on your honeymoon and get wine lusty, local islands are NOT for you.

If you feel to add any other tidbits that you think people traveling to UAE and Maldives should know, just comment below this post. I’d love to read your tips as well!

– Mirna