Tag: Travel

Carnival in Jamaica 2018 Recap

Well, I’ve been home for a week now and BOYYYY has this week sucked. With the incredible weather I experienced in Jamaica, coming back to ice-rain and snow really sucks lemons. The usual carnival tabanca burns, but when you have to endure an extended Canadian winter – it burns just a tad bit more.

Jamaica was awesome. Between the plethora of incredibly attractive men and women, the amazing food, my fill of dancehall music and perfect weather I can say my heart is full. Here is a daily recap of all the shenanigans that happened during my time in Kingston, Jamaica!

Thursday, April 5, 2018

This day started exceptionally early. Our flight to Kingston was at 1:30am from Pearson Airport. It was myself, my best friend Jummy and our friend Kyra en route for this carnival. There really isn’t any excitement for this part of the journey except that we met up with some other friends at the airport and seven of us decided to do shots of rum on an empty stomach before boarding. Awesome. I should add, I was sick when we began this journey. In my head, I figured taking a shot would maybe clear my sinuses up a little.

Wrong. I was wrong. As we were descending into Kingston for the FIRST time in all my years of flying – my ears began to hurt. I had never felt such a strong pressure and pain in my head as I did in that moment. This feeling ended up lasting a day and a half, I was partially deaf until Friday afternoon.

So we land in Kingston at 4:30am and our driver is nowhere to be found. Not exactly the greatest sign of things to come, but, luckily I called him and woke him up and he said he was on his way. Around 5:15am our driver (David) arrived and we began our journey out to Havendale where our AirBnB was located. I will say, driving through Kingston at sunrise was incredible to see. It was already 26 degrees outside and you could feel the city waking up with it. Great feeling at the time.

Our AirBnB was HUGE. This place had a kitchen, living room, a downstairs bathroom, two bedrooms upstairs (with an en suite bathroom in each one) and a big front yard. Probably one of the best choices we made was to stay in this particular AirBnB. Our host Barrington was awesome as well, he was easy to call at all times and super helpful checking us in at 5:30am.

All three of us took a nap at this point because we knew a long ass day was ahead of us.

Noon. Time to get up and get to moving. The first place we were off to was to pick up our tshirts and wristbands for AMBush (j’ouvert). Luckily, this part was very straightforward and organized. We were in and out in no time. Unfortunately, our next pick up was our costumes for Xodus and that didn’t begin until 3pm. Naturally, we went to get food in between all of this. Found a place called ‘Mothers’ and threw my whole face into some jerk chicken and festival. My body was ready for this. Delicious.

We get over to Xodus now for our costume pick up and we sure were lucky arriving when we did. I was #27 on the wait list for pickup upon arrival, within six minutes the girl who sat down next to me was #64. Yikes. I was fortunate because my costume pieces and everything were bless for pick up, although I didn’t know until then that my costume was actually a one-piece? Fine. I can deal. Also, I loved the duffel bag we got for our goodie bag from Xodus!! I should note the back piece to my frontline costume was massive. This was my first time playing frontline and holy crap, I knew I’d look fabulous for my pictures but that no way all of these pieces would last long on me. (Fast forward to Sunday, I was right.)

Unfortunately, my friend Kyra was having some issues with her cage bra fitting so we ended up having to wait a little longer for that to be fixed at the mas camp. From there we had to speed back to our AirBnB, shower, get changed and head off to our first event. AFloat boat ride starting at 5:30pm.

I had a good time on this boat cruise. The vibes were nice, the sunset views were awesome and there was some slackness on the boat as well. My kind of party. It was a good way to kick off the partying for Jamaica. As someone who loves rum, the only two rums I do not like are Appleton and Wray & Nephew. As you can imagine, being in Jamaica this put me at a disadvantage at all the all-inclusive parties we bought tickets for. I drank Johnny Walker and Coke at AFloat. It wasn’t so bad….. I guess. Not like I died, so I’ll take the win.

As soon as we disembarked from AFloat – race home, shower, change, off to Tribe Ignite for 11pm. This party was OK. I think I was just feeling it a little bit from being sick and the flight, being deaf and then the post-AFloat tipsiness. The best part of the night is we got to see our friend Sherry at the jam and that Kerwin and Kes performed, which is always a treat.

We went to leave Ignite and a random man at that point decided to try and swerve by telling me I look 16. What? I wasn’t sure at the time if I was more offended that he cut my age in half or that he might be attracted to 16 year olds? How did we get here? DAVID!!!! Time to take us home.

Friday, April 6, 2018

Candy Coated time! I love this boat ride. I loved it in Barbados and I was super excited to go to it in Jamaica. We arrived at around 11am and I think we finally sailed at noon. The most important thing you need to know is – THE FOOD! Omg the food selection on this boat was incredible. As soon as we got on the boat there was ackee and saltfish along with rasta pasta. As the boat ride went on there was curry goat and some jerk chicken as well. It is mid-afternoon in Jamaica, you are drinking a high dosage of rum punch, eating jerk chicken and dancing to soca with hundreds of other people.

Great feeling. Fun boat ride. I will say, this was one of the key moments where I had to stop myself from comparing Jamaica carnival to that of Cropover in Barbados. Sometimes you just have to accept that everyone does things differently or in their own individual way. I was use to Barbados being really hype up and slackness while in Jamaica they really prefer their groovy soca. Don’t get me wrong, I love soca but power soca and bashment soca is my fave.  I just expected it to be different. It wasn’t just this party either, at AFloat, Tribe and on road there really was a preference to play groovy soca. Foreign concept to me.

One VERY different thing in Jamaica was also the presence of weed absolutely everywhere in the open. At the Candy Coated boat ride they even gave away their own Candy Coated spliffs with their goodie bags. Although I am not a smoker, it was kind of a nice talking piece seeing how happy those around me were with these extra item in their goodie bags.

After Candy Coated we realized that we had no food back at our AirBnB and that we would need to have some fuel before we hit the road that night for AMbush.

Let me give you all a GREAT TIP OK? If you are outside in a fishnet top, or a bathing suit with a thong and cover up – DO NOT go to the grocery store. Don’t do it. Somehow it seemed like a great idea for us to go in such outfits to a grocery store in the middle of the afternoon to get food after a boat ride. I cannot even begin to tell you the kinds of looks we got from the workers and the patrons at the store. There was definitely someone in there who was going to ask for penance on behalf of us in church that Sunday. What a spectacle.

It was time to try and get some more sleep before what was going to be an exceptionally long Saturday night-morning-afternoon-evening.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

You thought Thursday was long? Thursday ain’t got shit on what our Saturday looked like.

First of all, we wake up for Jummy to make us some eggs and bacon before we hit the road for AMbush. So, the fire stove wouldn’t turn off. We tried all the knobs, we Skyped my mom, nothing – we could not turn off this damn stove. Finally we had to call the owner of the AirBnB to yes, turn a knob off for us. We found out it wasn’t us being dunce, it was the knob being a damn knob. Crisis averted.

David picked us up at 1:30am to take us to where AMbush was being held in the parish of St. Catherine. I have no idea what we were thinking arriving so promptly for a party that goes until 8am. I think we finally boarded the shuttle to get to the liquor trucks/music trucks around 3am? Waste. Could have been sleeping more. When the party picked up though? WHAT A TIME. I can see why people like attending AMbush now. When the liquor hits you, its nighttime, there’s paint in your eye and your unmentionables….. you’re really in for a good time.

People were throwing paint everywhere! I was covered head to toe but it was nice because unlike the j’ouvertish event I do in Barbados, the paint they use here was water-based. So I didn’t turn all crunchy and stiff from the paint. I loved every minute of this party. To top it off, when we were leaving at 6:30am, we were one of the first people to get to their food tents that were set up post-party to enjoy. I didn’t know that was a thing? Imagine? You’re exhausted, its 6:30am, you can only taste paint and now you walk up to like 7 tents of all you can eat food that is included in your ticket price? Heaven. This is heaven. I must have slipped on some paint and died and gone to heaven. Largest doubles I had ever seen in my life were consumed at this moment.

Our driver had actually slept in his car for the duration of the party so he whisked us away ASAP so we could get back to our AirBnB for 7:30am and leave for our next party at 9:00am.

PACE!

As you’ll see in the pictures below, I deadass went from ugly swamp creature to princess in a matter of an hour. This is probably as girly as any of you will ever seen me, so take it in. You’re welcome. Usually it would take me about an hour or so to get the paint off of me, but this time it was just washing off so easily. Not to say I wasn’t finding random specks of green paint in my ears for days after, but at that moment I was as clean as I could be.

We were picked up at 9:00am and made our way to Constant Spring Golf Course to attend a party called Sunrise Breakfast Fete which is considered the crown jewel of events for carnival in Jamaica. All-inclusive food and liquor. Massive space. I won’t pretend like I didn’t feel like death at this moment in time following AMbush and still feeling the fatigue of being sick.

Hot sun. I mostly remember the heat. When you’re still a little tipsy and been dancing since 3am, you feel the sun sooo different. The lineups at the venue were long since it began at 5am and we didn’t get there until 9am and I have to say, I was a little disappointed. Not only were the lineups super long but they were running out of food regularly. I stood in one line for 20 minutes only to get to my time to be served and they informed me ‘oh we are making a new batch, it will be another 20 minute wait.’ What? Are you duuuuuumb? I think I finally got like some little serving of food at a next booth that didn’t have much of a line, eventually. At least the bars were moving quickly, I will give them that. I must have drank a gallon of coconut water at Sunrise to try and gain some strength in my body to continue partying in that heat.  Also, whoever did the design/set up of Sunrise should be given a medal for how visually appealing it was. The set up was nice and simple with beautiful bright colours everywhere. The stage had DJ Puffy on it and I hear later in the day Aidonia performed as well.

We stayed at Sunrise until noon and then we had David drive us over to Kingston Harbour where our friend Sherry had invited us to spend the day on her family’s three-bedroom yacht. No big deal. Just you know, massive yacht for like 10 of us for the day.

This yacht was INCREDIBLE. As soon as I stepped into it I felt like my credit score went up by 100 points. Jummy and Kyra both took the opportunity to go shower in the lower deck while I just sat in awe posting ignorant things on IG. Eventually Sherry arrived with her awesome family bringing liquor and KFC. If you haven’t had Jamaican KFC, what are you really doing with your life? Game changer.

The boat took off to this beautiful little beach (sandbank?) called Maiden Cay. What a marvel. Probably one of the most pristine and beautiful stretches of beach I have ever seen. Because our yacht was so gargantuan we had to park it a little further away from the beach so all of us would have to swim about 50-60 meters to get to it. For me, this wasn’t an issue, and I ended up being the first one to jump in the water and make my way over to the beach. I’m not going to throw shade at the other people on the yacht with us, but, I’m BIG and my friend Sherry’s cousin Craig is also a fellow fluffy – we swam JUST fine multiple times to and from the boat. Some other people who will remain unnamed and skinny used floaties and a boat to have to get back to the yacht. SMH.

We spent a couple of hours just hanging out on the beach, somehow we got a bottle of Appleton and Wray over onto the beach, Sherry and Kyra posed for an impromptu tent advertisement and along came a party boat as well. The girls left me on the beach and headed back to the yacht in a smaller boat and as I went to leave I noticed there as a full bottle of Wray still left on the beach. So, naturally, I swam back to the yacht with a bottle of Wray in one hand. Michael Phelps ain’t got shit on me, if we being real.

The rest of the afternoon and early evening was spent dancing on the yacht and just shooting the shit. A highlight of my 31-years of life is I Genna Bounced on a yacht in Jamaica as the sun set. I’m not sure what life event could possibly top this, but I would like to see it try. Eventually we made our way back to the harbour and in some miscommunication our driver didn’t know he was supposed to come pick us up at that time. Luckily our host Craig, had a pick up truck. We sat in the back of a pick up truck on our way to Port Royal to get some food. Bumpy ride with a lot of squealing from me. How embarrassing.

I was probably the most excited person EVER to go to Port Royal. Please understand, when I was doing my degree in Caribbean Studies I remember reading about the story of Port Royal. The place was considered to be the wickedest place on earth during the time of colonies and pirates that God decided to sink it! In 1692 Port Royal had an earthquake and basically a massive piece broke off and vanished into the sea. Obviously, that as just mother nature doing her thing but the whole myth behind it being the wickedest place on earth always created a great story in my mind.

Fish soup. Steamed fish. Garlic shrimp. Oysters. Bammy. Festival. I HAD IT ALL. Port Royal for seafood was most welcoming to my tummy. It was about 10pm and we had been up since the night before at midnight, it was finally time to go back to our AirBnB for some much needed sleep.

Sunday, April 8 – Monday, April 9 2018

Finally! Time to play mas.

This is the day we had been waiting for. All the times I was at the gym to drop to 200lbs. All the stamina I had been building by playing basketball. It all culminated on the Sunday. My fancy decorated shoes (Bosnia and Canada flag) and my teeny weeny thong costume were ready. David picked us up at 10:30am to head for the road.

I have no idea if Xodus had a breakfast in the morning. Maybe if we had arrived earlier we would have known? I was accustomed to a breakfast included when I play mas so if they didn’t have it – that sucks.

There is no need for a whole days worth of recap playing mas. If you have played mas, you know how it goes. Dancing. Dancing. Chipping. Water. More dancing. Let me focus on the new things that happened to me that day.

Well, like I said earlier – all those fancy pieces of my costume got thrown off of me within an hour of me being on the road. The big beautiful feathers, the heavy necklace of pearls… all gone. In the heat and for my mobility, I just couldn’t do it anymore. I removed my back piece, walked over to a fence and left it there. FREEDOM.

I did take issue with the amount of groovy soca played, again. Shout out to DJ Puffy for the awesome dancehall set he did play. Also, to Aidonia, Shanseea and Bunji for their performances. There was only so many times I could hear: Hulk, Full of Vibes, Hello and did I mention Hulk? For all the complaints I heard before I got to Jamaica that they play ‘too much dancehall’ at their soca events, I definitely saw no examples of this during my time there. I was still having a wonderful time with my friends though, don’t get it twisted.

One BIG bonus the road in Jamaica had (or at least Xodus did) was the midday cool down. WHAT A BLESSING! There was a massive space for all the Xodus masqueraders to sit down, eat, drink, get a massage, makeup touch up and get their costume fixed. One hour of relaxation and reenergizing to finish off the day. I ate a small piece of KFC and got my fill of coconut water. The other girls I believe hit up the makeup touch up and massages as well.

Once we were back on the road it felt like it went by so quickly. Suddenly it was already sunset and the day on the road was finishing. How? Holy crap. Sherry checked her fancy pants watch and it said we had crossed 17km of walking. Crazy.

Now we got to this awesome post-road party Xodus had called Wine Down.

Let me tell you guys, if you do absolutely NOTHING else all Jamaica carnival, make sure you go to Wine Down! Best party for the entire time I was there. We arrived and had dinner, put our feet up a little bit and BOOM got to some more dancing. The cool thing was Xodus had free entry to this party for ALL masqueraders from all the bands. The DJs and the hosts were awesome. The music? BLESS. I got a whole set of dancah chunes. By the end of this party I truly believe I was a pro at: Genna Bounce, Flairy, Fling and Lebeh Lebeh. Absolutely no doubt in my intoxicated mind – I was the new member of the Ravas crew.

This party was the most perfect way to end this day and this trip. Also, quick shout out to the man at the Grace stand who was making some concoction of like oats, cinnamon, coconut, almond…I have no idea. It was delicious and it felt like it gave me all my power back to keep going.

We really were dancing 10:30am to 11pm that day. Felt incredible.

The Sunday was such a wild day that our taxi driver picked us up in another persons taxi. No lie. He was out drinking at another party and was picking us up with another driver for him. That was a new phenomenon for me.

Monday morning came. Slept. Packed. Cleaned up. Returned keys. Headed to the airport. It was over. The whirlwind that is Jamaica carnival as over with. I regret not going to the airport even earlier because their food choices and shopping choices are amaaazing. I also didn’t know white Hennessy cost $80USD. NOT impressed.

Time to fly home. Sadness.

Overall Jamaica carnival really was a great event to experience. Way cheaper than Cropover, without the scorching heat as well. Would I go back for carnival again? Eh. Probably not. Most of what I loved was because I was in Jamaica, not necessarily because it was carnival. I will 100% go back to Kingston, Jamaica though. That city gives you a great feeling inside and out. The food, the people and the culture. If for some reason I am there again during carnival, find me at Wine Down. I would not miss that.

If you’re wondering the costs associated with this entire trip, make sure to click here. Gives a breakdown of what I paid for flight + stays + parties.

Song of The Trip: Showtime – Machel Montano

– Mirna

My Travel Must-Haves

Hello all! 

I get asked a lot via DM’s and e-mails about what I bring with me when I travel. What are the items needed for going to X country or Y country etc. Figured I’d put together a nice little list for everyone (with links) so I could just forward it to people every time they ask me. I’m sure I will think of some more but at this current time the lucky number seven will have to do.

Stay Current

First of all, you need a voltage converter. When I traveled to Europe and to Asia I always brought this super cheap (but effective) converter with me. I actually don’t even know the brand name of it, but it has served me well for MANY years and through many countries. The link for it is here. 

Stay Social

The other item that I always have on me for travel and also in my day-to-day shenanigans is my portable charger. Because I like to post on Snapchat and IG constantly, my battery can get drained pretty quickly while on vacation. Imagine? I’m out gallivanting and see something beautiful and suddenly I can’t even record the memory? No thanks. That is not the lifestyle I want to live. I’ve had my Anker charger for about three or four years now and it comes in really handy. Not only does it save me when I’m traveling alone, it also has TWO ports for charging so my friend who takes a lot of selfies won’t have her phone die either. We can charge at the same time. HURRAY SELFIES! The cost of this is on the pricier side, but the amount was well worth it to me. If I charge this portable battery just once, I can be on road and get my Google Pixel to go 0-100% a whole 6 times. Blessaz. You can buy it here.

Stay Unbothered

A new purchase I made as a recommendation from one of my Twitter followers is to get into using wireless headphones. I was a little skeptical because I can be absentminded and lose things, but so far it has worked out very well for me. The headphones I would usually buy are from the dollar store and I break them within a week or I end up just being able to use them for listening instead of phone calls as well. Spending more than $2.00 on headphones really was asking me to do a lot. But I did, and I love them. No dealing with stupid wires anymore and they’re comfy and block out the noise on airplanes so well. I bought these Sony headphones here.

I will note, they are also really clear for telephone calls and cancel out the techno crap gyms play loudly while you’re running on a treadmill. One charge will give you 8hrs of use! 

Stay Dry

When I was leaving for my trip to Bali I began reading a lot of message boards to see what the weather in December is like. Rain. Rain. More Rain. Well, shit. Made sense why the flight was so cheap at the time. Apparently in December for Bali, Singapore AND Kuala Lumpur it was normal to get a lot of rain – I was going to all of them. I was already intending on just traveling with a backpack for this trip but now I realized I probably needed to get a waterproof one just in case. I must have spent hours reading and picking through other people’s opinions. Well, I finally had found the one and I made a great decision. The Quest Mariner 20L, which can be purchased here, was the one for me. This backpack is sturdy and it is crazy expandable. I had left Canada traveling with only 11lbs with me, and during my return I went souvenirs-crazy and I think the bag expanded at LEAST another 30%.  It withstood the rain, the tossing around into airplane overheads and didn’t feel uncomfortable at all to carry around. For this price and what you get out of it – great buy.

Also, if you’re crappy at packing…. I made a whole post for you previously on my blog, found here.

Stay Clean

While on the topic of items needing to be waterproof, if you travel alone or go to carnival – you need to have something for your phone/money to stay dry.  I know that I don’t feel comfortable leaving my phone and hotel key card unattended at the beach, so I always have my waterproof bag with them in it for when it is time to swim. Also, if you go to any carnivals I know at some point you will end up in a j’ouvert situation and need to have your money, phone and keys on you staying dry/clean so these bags are perfect for it. You get two of them and they can be purchased here. I realize many people still use regular plastic bags to keep their items dry and that is cool too, but I know I personally like having both of my hands free when trying to hold both liquor and the back of a truck. 

(Note: Anytime you purchase waterproof cases, first do the tissue test with it. Place a tissue inside of it, close it and completely submerge the case under water. When you take it out after 5 minutes, check if that tissue is still completely dry inside. Then you’ll have the reassurance of it keeping your money, phone etc. dry as well.)

Stay Light

Fun story; when I use to try and weigh my luggage I would first weigh myself on a scale and then pick up my luggage and stand on the scale with it and subtract the difference. I’m dead serious, that is how I use to check to see how much my luggage weighed. As you can imagine, that provided incorrect measurements on MORE than one occasion. With carry-on fees and checked-in luggage fees becoming ridiculous for some airlines, I advise everyone to buy an actual baggage scale. I bought mine before my trip to Bali so that I could make sure my carry-on would be OK for all my domestic flights in Asia. It can be bought here, and I promise you it will save you the awkward ‘shit let me transfer some stuff from this bag to this bag‘ at the airport check in line OR even worse, having to pay extra for your luggage to the airline. 

Stay Comfy

So you’re leaving on a long ass flight, lets say, 15hrs direct to Shanghai from Toronto and you’re not trying to carry a lot of extra crap on you BUT you want something to make your flight more comfortable. Or maybe, you somehow got caught in the shitty middle seat on the airplane? I got something for you! I found this gem back in 2016 and have been using it ever since for any flights over 6hrs. It is called the Travelrest and can be purchased here. I like to hug my pillow when I sleep at home, so being able to actually embrace something to fall asleep on a plane was a game changer for me. Most of the travel pillows you just lay your neck/head on but with this one you can hold on to it and sleep comfortably on your side, even if you are in the middle airplane seat. Also, unlike the other neck pillows, this one deflates into basically nothing  and can be wrapped up so you don’t have to carry around something bulky or worry about dropping it on the filthy airport ground. It is super sturdy to hold on to because it wraps around your head rest and your seat belt to stay in place. Love it.

I hope some of these will make travel easier for you like they did for me. Also, if you’re in a hurry I’d recommend getting Amazon Prime like I did because sometimes you need things for your trip ASAP and getting it within two days is awesome. Happy travels! 

– Mirna

4 Places That Didn’t ‘WOW’ Me That Everyone Else Loves

During my travels, not EVERY place was somewhere I fell madly in love with and hoped to return one day. I learned quickly that some places are like some men – nice to look at but lack the depth of wanting to ever see them again. They are like a geographical catfish, somewhere that looks so good in IG pictures but when you get there it just lacks the ‘wow’ you wanted.

For me? Those four places are Venice, St. Bart’s, Barcelona and Atlanta. 

Now before you attack me ‘OMGTHATSMYFAVORITEPLACEEVERHOWCOULDYOUNOTLIKEIT?!’ This is fine, shit happens. Not every place suits every personality or travel goal. 

Let me start with Atlanta.

During my walk home from J'Ouvert in Atlanta I walked by here, because it was a 40 minute wait for taxis.
During my walk home from J’Ouvert in Atlanta I walked by here, because it was a 40 minute wait for taxis.

 

I went to Atlanta back in May of 2013 for Atlanta Carnival. As a regular carnival-goer I saw the cheap flight and hotel opportunity if I flew from Buffalo to there and figured I’d go check out what an American carnival looked like. I really do not know what the fuck I was thinking. 

My understanding of Atlanta was based off too many rap videos that included Magic City and some sordid ‘this gonna be a freaknik type weekend’ ideologies. BOY WAS I WRONG. It was nothing like that. I found downtown Atlanta to be so quiet and peaceful. This really upset me. On the Sunday of our trip mostly everything was even closed downtown and people were out with their families in parks. Y’all got parks? Days off? WHAT? As a hardcore Torontonian this was completely beyond my mind. Although the people were probably some of the nicest I have ever met, the timidity was too much for what I expected Atlanta to be like ESPECIALLY since I was there for a carnival. 

The carnival itself was awful as well. The parade route was maybe 2 km? The men and the women didn’t dance on each other at all and there was children everywhere on the parade route. How am I suppose to get on bad at a family event? I’m not even going to talk about the fetes we went to, because that would require me to go to a worthless memory. Just not even worth talking about. 

Aside from the incredibly nice people, delicious food and some baddies at Magic City – I really have no wish to return there. That city is way too well behaved for my shenanigans.

Moving on to Venice.

Me, on a gondola in Venice. My gondolier was NOT impressed.
Me, on a gondola in Venice. My gondolier was NOT impressed.

People have this romantic and wanderlusting image of Venice, I can’t blame them. All of us heard about those winding canals, romantic scenery and the hopes that we would one day be with our love on a gondola being serenaded. Sounds so wonderful right? 

I gave Venice a big ‘meh’ – I found it overrated, crowded and very mean. I wanted to so badly fall in love with Venice as someone who had been dying to go there for a good portion of my life. It really did nothing for me. 

My best friends and I were in Venice in June 2015 and none of us left particularly impressed by it. (Full disclosure: we were only there on a day trip from Croatia.) To start, holy shit is it expensive. My mom had told me it would be as she is someone who still loves Venice after being there couple of times. But we were NOT ready.

Now when I say expensive I don’t mean the ‘I can’t afford this meal’ expensive I mean the ‘WHY THE HELL DOES SITTING AND DRINKING AN ORANGE JUICE HERE COST 21 EUROS?’ expensive. The scenery in Piazza San Marco is beautiful and cool to see, but do I have some deep need to ever see it again? Not really. 

We weren’t even there in the major part of tourist season as it was only the middle of June, so I cannot even imagine how crazy it is during July and August. As someone who walks like a maniac down the streets of Toronto, this just did not work for me. We did however manage to get cursed at in Italian by an elderly man because we weren’t aware of the walking rules. (Something about walking on the left? fungula?) 

We did the gondola ride, that was neat. Just to be able to say we did that. The odor from the water had already begun in this part of June, so I imagine in the hotter months it must smell even worse. The best part of Venice was looking at the local men in their suits. If you are into beautiful Italian men who wear the most perfectly fitting suits you have ever seen? Then YES do go to Venice. There is a plethora of them and if you stare hard enough, you may also see one get slapped by his girlfriend. Yes, that happened as well.

Same trip, Barcelona.

At La Barceloneta Beach, with the other thousands of people. 
At La Barceloneta Beach, with the other thousands of people. 

 When we went on this Euro trip that included Venice, we also had a couple of days in Barcelona. We had arrived in Barcelona after spending time in Madrid. The reason this is pertinent is we only went to Madrid because it was the cheapest flight into Europe at the time and we wanted to use it as a passage to the ‘more fun’ Barcelona. Again, WOW were we wrong.

I’m not sure if Barcelona would have come off more incredible if we had not gone to Madrid, but because we took that route, Barcelona seemed just OK. We had such an (unexpectedly) amazing time in Madrid that when we got to Barcelona to me it was not even close in comparison.

I get it though. Barcelona is beach, art and party. We spent our first day on La Barceloneta beach and that is probably where my annoyance took shape. Why is there like 40,000,000 people on one beach? Every five seconds someone is asking me if I want food, massage or liquor. I just want to rest and get rid of this hangover, why must you talk to me? On top of that, the annoying 20-something groups of Brit males that were drunk and everywhere on the beach ‘play-fighting’ made it even worse. 

The club scene was cool, I could see how that would be a draw for Barcelona. We went clubbing that night to some bar that had the back of it go onto a stretch of beach. The drinks were expensive, most of the crowd was kind of douchey but at least the music was good and so was the scenery. But again, not as good as the clubs we enjoyed in Madrid. 

If you want party and beach, Barcelona is definitely for you. Just do not go to Madrid before it because it will completely outshine it.

Finally, St. Bart’s. 

Nikki Beach, where if you play Future too loud someone will give you a mean look.
Nikki Beach, where if you play Future too loud someone will give you a mean look.

At the end of 2015, I took a trip to St. Maarten and was fortunate to be able to fit a day trip to Anguilla and St. Bart’s during that trip. While I absolutely adored St. Maarten and Anguilla, St. Bart’s was not my cup of tea at all.

St. Bart’s is one of those places you hope to be wealthy enough to see one day. Personally, I couldn’t in my wildest dreams think I could be NOT rich and get to this island. I was really excited to see it because all I ever read about was this place being the playground for the rich and famous. 

When we arrived in our boat, the FIRST thing we saw was about 15-20 yachts parked with those 1% people having their breakfast on it. For someone who was hype to see where these exact people come to hang out, seeing that imagery really makes you realize how NOT-rich you are. We had some quick conversations with the other people that had come on the day trip and they told us Russell Simmons had just walked by them and how a hamburger at a restaurant close by was 40 EUROS. Oh dear. We had arrived.

We were fortunate enough to befriend two girls on the boat that rented a Jeep to go cruise the island so we could see more of this beautiful and rich playground. As we were driving, we were quickly reminded of how French this island was. It was like Quebec Jr. I would assume that the people were more likely from actual France, but because I have never been to France I cannot comment on their locals. However, as someone who has dealt with ONE too many Quebecers in Canada and abroad, the attitudes and behaviours seemed to fit. My goodness were they crass and rude. They looked and spoke down to everyone there who was not wearing $400 Gucci flip flops. 

On the one side of the island we parked and brought our things onto Nikki Beach. Gorgeous. This beach was so clean and relaxed. I loved it. Then we decided to play some music and immediately the stares and dirty looks from the topless sunbathing French began. We had even found an area far away from everyone to play our music, and still, when they walked by the ces gens sont des paysans looks were evident. (Translation: These people are peasants) 

Between being expensive and full of jerks, I have no reason to ever return to St. Bart’s. I’m happy I saw it but I do not ever have to return. 

I realize many of my readers, my friends and even my mom love the places I mentioned. Some of you even live there and some of you have goals to travel there. I am not discouraging anyone from doing it nor will I judge if you liked it. They just did not do it for me. Whether my expectations were too high/convoluted (Atlanta and Barcelona) or maybe I’m not rich enough to enjoy them like I should (Venice and St. Bart’s) – I am perfectly fine with never returning to them ever again.

– Mirna 

 

Why You’re Terrible At Packing

As I sit here taking the 11 minutes that may be required to pack my bags for Chicago this weekend, I reminisce on all the people in the past two weeks I have helped with their packing woes. Then I think about how I traveled for 17 days through Asia with just 14lbs with me. It is a HELL of a juxtaposition because some of my friends don’t know how to pack under the 50lbs for a checked bag maximum – nonetheless JUST a carry-on.

This has all lead me to one conclusion: you people can’t pack properly because you’re too vain. 

VANITY. This is what keeps many of you from packing properly.  In the age of Snapchat, Instagram and now Facebook stories (I guess?) you need to have a different outfit for every one of those selfies. Your contour has to be perfect. Your fitted has to match your shoes. Heaven forbid you get seen in the same pair of shorts twice in a week right? No. Stop it. You’re being ridiculous, but I’ll get back to that.

Packing lighter can make your trip both cheaper and less frustrating. I understand if you are going for just one week to Cuba, you can pack that 50lb checked-in bag and it will sit in your room the whole time so it really isn’t a nuisance. But for those traveling to multiple countries in one trip, why put yourself through that?

In 2015 my friends and I did Madrid, Barcelona, Athens, Santorini, Venice and Pula in one trip. If only I could have been a bit smarter then, oh how I wish. We ALL traveled with a carry-on and a 50lb checked in bag. Do you know how shitty it is to be lost on the narrow streets of Barcelona in 28 degree heat and pulling 50lbs with you? It sucked. On top of that, although we were lucky enough to get very good prices for airfare within Europe, it would have been cheaper if we didn’t have to pay for the checked in luggage.

I learned my lesson from this trip and when I went to Shanghai, Bali, Kuala Lumpur and Singapore this past December I carried with me a large 3lb ‘personal item’ bag and my 11lb waterproof carry-on bag. 14lbs all together for 17 days of shenanigans. And you know what? It was more than enough.

My personal bag had: tablet, charger, phone, charger, electricity converter, portable charger, passport, four currencies of money, hand sanitizer, a pen, chapstick, 3 allergy pills and my headphones.

My carry-on had: two pairs of denim shorts, one dress, two sandals, three bikinis, two tanks, two tops, a sarong, a purse, two sunglasses, undergarments, small toiletries and Melatonin and Malaria pills and a deflating pillow.

14lbs. That was all I needed. While traveling I had a pair of leggings on with a hoodie and a long sleeve shirt (airplanes are cold, Shanghai wasn’t warm) and my comfiest pair of running shoes. The heaviest items I wore while flying to avoid packing them and to be warm on the 13 hour flight across the world. 

When packing all I thought about was; what was the lightest option for moving around easily, saving time not having to check in or wait for bags after landing and the smaller cost for not having to pay for a checked in bag for flights within Asia. What never crossed my mind was how I’d look in some repeated outfits or without every single piece of makeup I own.

This is where I come back to my original point of vanity being a lot of your issues with packing. You worry too much about: what if I don’t have this? what if I have to go out? what if someone sees me twice in same outfit? what if something gets dirty? 

You’ll manage. I promise. 

Unless it is an absolute necessity, you will find another one of whatever piece of clothing is needed when you travel. (probably for cheaper too) If you’re going out you can wear your shorts with a nice top. If someone sees you in the same outfit twice, it won’t be the end of the world. If it gets dirty, then pay the small fee in many countries to have it washed. When I was in Bali, after a week of sweating and being in my clothes I got all of my items washed for $6 to wear for the next leg of my trip. It is doable.

Also to the ladies, you do NOT need to bring your 36 pieces of makeup on a trip to a hot place. In reality, you don’t have to bring that on a trip anywhere, but especially when it is going to be hot every day and you’ll be sweating and going swimming. Makeup is heavy and will take up all your room if you let it. I’m not saying don’t bring any, but your massive contouring kits are really uncalled for.

This also goes for men and shoes, wear the shoes you will be traveling in (pick black ones, just in case) and then your sandals. There is no need for you to have 4-5 pairs of Air Max in your bag, if you don’t match once or twice with your fitted I promise it won’t be the end of the world either. 

This is what I want you to think about next time you are packing and that vanity starts creeping into your head. Would you rather have a different outfit and pose in front of Scarborough Town Center OR have a similar top on in two pictures but those are at the Vatican and at the Parthenon? No one cares that you’re wearing the same top twice in those pictures, the whole point is you’re glowing because you’re on vacation and you’re somewhere that many people wish they could one day see too. 

Switch to lighter travel everyone. You will not regret it and will realize how ridiculous you were lugging around massive bags or paying overage fees and how how much quicker your time in airports is. 

– Mirna 

How To Travel In A Group And Still Remain Friends After

Not everyone is a fan of loner travel like I am. I personally love the freedom of doing what I want, when I want and planning it however the hell I want. I realize, other people are afraid of traveling alone and just overall may prefer to travel in groups. But what do you do when your friends are waste or shitty at planning?

This is where I can tell you, you are not alone. Many people have friends who are good humans in this country, but god awful in others/while planning to go to others.

I have come up with a ‘how to’ properly travel in a group trip without losing your mind or friendships.

  1. Don’t travel with broke people; not everyone is in the financial situation to travel but for some reason SO MANY feel that it is still a brilliant idea to travel anyways. Tell them politely to wait for the next opportunity, trust me, they’ll weigh you down and piss you off once you get to your destination. You know the ‘oh I’ll just have ice water and a sugar cube at dinner’ people? Or heaven forbid there is an emergency on the trip or you miss your flight and they now stuck in Lebanon selling milk on side of road to get home. Don’t do it. Tell them to save up and maybe next time.
  2.  Someone MUST be the designated asshole; so there’s five of you planning a trip to Ireland, one of you has to put the other four on a schedule and on notice. This person is in charge of making sure that deposits are paid on the proper dates and telling the other four that if they fail to do so, NO trip for them. Simple. No hurt feelings, it’s just business and one person being flawed/late on their payment could cost the rest of you more money or even an awesome spot that had a deadline to book.
  3. Schedule. Schedule. Schedule; you have to set payment dates, and I mean HARD payment dates. If the payment for your villa for Cropover is due December 15th, then all of those coming should have money ready December 1st. This gives you all until next pay week to make the money back JUST IN CASE one or two people suddenly can’t go. This is where the designated asshole has to lie and give an earlier payment date to everyone, because stuff like this can and will happen. You need to have time to adjust. Best case scenario? Everyone actually gives you the money on December 1st to pay – now it’s paid. The end.
  4. Don’t plan trips with closed-minded people; so your friends are fun, some are eccentric, but are they the type to just stay on the resort? Are they the type that want to do super-touristy things while you enjoy a more real experience? Will they only want to eat McDonald’s in Greece but you traveled there to eat, I don’t know, Greek food? Consider these things before you even put forth the idea of a group trip. You don’t want to be in Italy with someone who is fun to party with but doesn’t know what the Sistine Chapel is.
  5. Start small, then go big; do try smaller trips with your friends before you go all out and have 15 of you going to Phuket. Small trips to Montreal or Niagara etc. will show you how reliable your friends are with minimal planning and saving needed. If they are seamless at a road trip weekend to Montreal, then those are the people you would like to plan a much bigger trip with. Look for how reliable they are, how timely and how responsible. You don’t need to find out that someone is completely unreliable as you arrive to your hotel in Tokyo with no reservation because they forgot to do it/did it wrong.

Luckily, I have been blessed in never having any issues in the group travel I did partake in. Probably, because I strongly believe in these five things and because I’m usually the designated asshole. I really do hope these tips help keep your travels happy and your friendships solid. 

Extras: If you plan on using AirBnB for the first time, click here for a free credit towards your booking! Also, if you plan on using Uber for the first time,click here for a free credit towards the ride.

– Mirna 

Myself + my friends Sherry and Jummy in Athens. (Yep, we are still friends after the trip) 
Myself + my friends Sherry and Jummy in Athens. (Yep, we are still friends after the trip)